Not all friends see eye to eye

My Republican, gun toting, Bush-loving friend, Stephen will be leaving for Iraq this June. He will be serving as a soldier in the United States Army. Fortunately, he will be serving in a military hospital that is on a military base. He will not be parading around Baghdad or applying layer after layer of sunscreen in the middle of combat fire. For these reasons, I feel like I can rest a little easier. I just finishing talking to him on the phone and during the conversation he said the most beautiful words one could hope for:

“I probably won’t even leave the base.”

To be honest, I’m having different thoughts and feelings about his departure to Iraq. I don’t think it’s all a matter of politics, even though we have the ability to debate politics for days on end. All it takes is for someone to mention, let’s say, gun control and we’ll probably be on the phone until 5 AM. We often reach the point of agreeing to disagree, which has held our friendship together. In this sense, our friendship is unique. I almost always know I’m not going to see things the way he sees them but I am willing to listen to his position. And somehow I’m convinced this makes all the difference.

Which leads me to two main thoughts:

It’s difficult to reach a point of agreeing to disagree with someone. For many, this isn’t possible. I’ve had plenty of debates in which the person is obsessed with “winning” the argument. In these cases there is no genuine dialogue or sharing of ideas. Instead, the debate is about proving a point and nothing else.

I’ve often felt it’s worthwhile to hear different points of view. I don’t always want to be around people who think and act exactly as I do. I’m also interested in why the person holds their beliefs. In the case of Stephen, the why is simple: he’s been drinking the “I love Bush” Kool-Aid for a little too long and I suspect the stuff has addictive qualities.

Oh, and in case you are wondering: I kid! I kid! A part of our friendship has become endless teasing. Stephen will exaggerate as to how liberal I am (after all, according to him in the last presidential election I voted for the most liberal Senator in US history) and I, in return, will exaggerate when describing his conservative tendencies. Somehow it works out and I will be missing the discourse while he is away.